PyrosTheStickman 2010-07-25 21:05:53

Welcome TO!!!!Autotuned Old Man Rambles!Episode 1!!!Of a 3000 part series....caaaaalled.....Autotuned Old Man Rambles! Actually I think it was a 2007 part series.....they didn't really tell me the exact number of episodes!They just told me to go in front of the speaker....and start talking!I'm gonna start you off with a story that happened in 1959.It was 1958!WAIT I WAS JUST KIDDING round the fact.....that I wanted to have some cereal....so I made myself.....SOME TO-O-OAST!I set the toaster to.......3......or was it 4.........Actually I think it was Fi-i-ive!SO ANYWAY,I set the toaster to 2,and put in two pieces...of WHEAT BREAD.I WAITED 5 MINUTES!!! OOOOOOONE! TWOOOOOO! THREEEEEEEEE! FOOOOOOOOOOOOO0000000UR!*GASP* FIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEVE! DING!And THE TOAST POPPED UP! <wheeze>but holy smokes!</wheeze>THE TOAST WA-AS BHUUUUUUURNED!So I put in another one,and set it to a lower setting!6 I BELIEVE IT WAS!!!!THEN I WAITED......3 MINUTES!!! OOOOOONE! 2! Thr3333333 MINUTES!Ding.Toast pops up.But this time it wasn't cooked at all!So I just decided to have some ceeeeereal! I got the cereal......and poured myself,come cheerios. But....DANG IT!they FELL ALL OVER THE FLOOR! So I had no choice....but to pick up.....ALL THE CHEERIOS.....ONE BY ONE:D ONE CHEERIO!TWOOOOOOOOOO CHEERIO!THREEEEE CHEERIO!FOOUR CHEERIO!NO WAIT!They were bran flakes!!!!!1 bran flake!2 bran flake!3 bran flake!4 bran flake!5 bran flake!6 bran flake!Seeeee-viiiiin bran flake!By this time I was up to 8 braaaaaaan flake!And I was almost a quarter.....of the way there.10 braaaaa-nooo wait! I almost skipped 9 bran flake!9 bran flake!te-e-en bran flake!ELEVEN!Bran flake!12 cheerio....twee-ee-ee!Umm....eh, THIRTEEN BRAN FLAKE!I was down to 13....and at 12!12 bran flake!14 bran flake!15 bran flake!SIX....T33N....<quiet>braaan flake.seventeen bran flake.18....bran flake.</quiet>NIIIIIIIINE.....TEEEEN BRAN FLAKE!TWENTY B RAN FLA-A-AKE!I WAS UP TO 20....and STI-I-IL COUNTING!umm...22 bran flake.........Twenty...fi-i-ive bran flake......I think I dropped one at 21......then I went back to 20!!!!bran flake........23 bran flake.24 BRAN FLAKE!25....bran...flake.26 BRAN FLAKE!TWENTYSEVEN BRAN FLAKE!BY this tiiiiime I was counting by twoooooooooooooooooz!30 BRAN FLAKE!.....oh......32..bran flake.I was counting by 2's so It was hard to pick both up with my small haaaaaands!My haaaaands were very smalll at the tiiiiieeeeeme!Wich was why whenever I tried to open a door,I used.....both hands!THIS WAS HARD BECAUSE I ONLY HAAAAAD ONE HAAAAND AT THE TIIIIIME.....due to the BLACK PLAGUE!Why do they call it the black plauge anyway?WHAT MAKES THE COLOR BLACK?!?!?MORE PLAGUEING THAN the coooolour....RED....Or Bluuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuue!

0r greeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeen!My favorite color is........bluuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu e !Or yeeee-low!Wihch,why,they make the color GR33n!Green like THE PA-AST!GREEEEEEN LIKE a TREEEEEEEEEEEEE!GrEEEEEEN LIKE STEWAGE!GREEEN LIKE THE SKY AFTER AN ALIEN APOCALYPSE!GREEN like an exit sign!yellow like the grass!Orange like my fa-ther's foot medicine!GREEN LIKE MY FEET!Speaking of the color green,my feet are green,Due to the green plague!What makes the color green?MOOOOOORE PLAGUEING than the co-olor blue!...um uh....I lost my train of thougt!I lost it where did it goooooo?...where'd it go?Amoeba!There it is!HAHAhaha!Where was I?Ah,yes!Old man Rambles!All right,so don't you hate it,like,when you're asking someone to tell you a story...So they tell you the story!But they
start the story and then they like........going to the door....uh right?Why are you asking meeee?I don't know!And you're the one.....telling the stooooooory around here!I'm not the one telling the story....then why did you say me after the thing you wanted to TELL ME!!!!!!!!!!!-IT- MAKES ME FEEL RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR STOOOOOOORYYYY!I hate it cuz I'm being sidetracked from my original story, myyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy breakfast!35 bran flake!36 bran flake!37 BRAAAN FLAKE!38 BRAN FLAKE!the....th..th-FOOURTY BRAN FLAKE!41 bran flake!by this time I was almost done!But I wasn't hungry any more!So I just decided to go back to bed!I HAD TO CLIMB UP THE STAAAAIRS!One stair!Two stair!I stopped and remembered that I forgot,the cereal I was going to eat.So I went back the two stairs.
ONE STAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIR!TWOOOOOOooooo staaaair!And I grabbed all the cereal!Then I hopped up the stairs like a giddy school boy in the middle of July!and then I was up the staaairs!after only 15 minutes....on the record for me!Let me just go through the events in CHRONOLOGICAL ORDER without missing a single detail!I went up the first step like a happy man!I went up the second step...STIILL GOING STRONG!I went up the 3rd step feeling a little tired by this time!Climbing the 4th step was like climbing Mt everest on the back of a fat camel it was so hard!By the 5th step I was nearly dead!I was so tired,I couldn't make it to the sixth step,without the help of my cereal,wich I ate for NRG.I came into a repeating pattern of walking up 3 steps,then taking a bite of cereal,and walking up 3 more.I repeated this pattern in the same fashion until I got to the top of the stairs!I believe I did four revolutions of the pattern.Until I got to the top because I also had.....a little bit of cereal left.SO I ATE THE CEREAL,in threeeeeeeeeeeee bites.I'm a lean,healthy man,so I deciiided...to eat low fat cereal.That's when I remembered that the cereal I got.....was bran flakes It was not low fat.Bran flakes are fattening,and fuuuuuuuul of butter!So I fell down the stairs,and I got the low fat cereal,SPECIAL K!!!!!!!!!!!!Special K's low fat,right?Yeah...I read the nutrition facts,just to make sure it was low fat.
-3 grams of salt,Special K cereal mix.............HIGH FRUCTOSE CORN SYRUP OH DANG IT I read!That's not good!High fructose corn syrup from released by the vacuum,is a dangerously man won't drink it level!So I saw another food I had in store although I had already eaten,the fattening cereal.I can't remember what happened next because I think I tripped and had unconciousness.But what I came to,I was in my bed all ready for the day.I think I had forgotten all about the adventure with the breakfast!So I got up thinking that I hadn't eaten!I went down the stairs,two steps at a time.Each step,was a-
*GUNSHOT**GUNCOCK*
WELL THAT TOOK CARE OF THAT!

HEY MISTER!I'm DYING HERE!HELP ME!SOMEBODY HELP ME!PLEEEEASE!I THINK....I'LL JUST COUNT....UNTIL SOMEONE.....HELPS ME!ONE!TWO!THREE!
*GUNSHOT**GUNCOCK*

I'M NOT DEAD YET

*GUNSHOT**GUNCOCK*

OKAY NOW I THINK I REALLY AM DEAD!BUT YAMIGHTWANNASHOOTANOTHERONEJUSTTOMAKE S URE!

*GUNSHOT**GUNCOCK*

OKAY NOW I'M DEAD FOR SURE!

wait,how am I still talking if I'm dead?Oh,THAT'S RIGHT!THIS IS NEWGROUNDS!SO PYROSTHESTICKMAN COULDN'T USE ANY SOUNDS,and the poor gun text.....was nothing more than text!There's no reason......to blam.....or remove the newspost...or reappend it,or any of that stuff that usually happens when PyrosTheStickman releases content onto the internet.SO,I THINK I'LL JUST GO *GUNSHOT**GUNCOCK*
GOODBYE,EVERYONE!AND FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO STUCK AROUND TILL THE END,YOU DESERVE A PRIZE!SO HERE IT is!<off key>never gonna GIVE YOU UP,never gonna let yoooou dooown!never gonna ruuuuuuuuuuun around and de ZERT YOU!</off key>HA!HA!You got rickrolled!rickrolled!<off key> never gonna make you cry!never gonna say good bye!Never gonna run around and seZert youuuuuu!EIIIIIIIIIIIIOOOOOOOOU!GIVE YOU UP!*COUGH COUGH COUGH.......*
</off key>
</autotuned old man rambles:D>